What, no crying and promising foot rubs every night if she just, fer the love of jeebus, leaves that creepy actor guy? You're soooo lucky.
...is there a reference I'm not getting in that comment? Or is this just a window into some unhappy breakup of your own?
I'm trying to figure out which of these scenarios happened *recently.*
#2 was a long time ago, if that's what you were wondering.
Googling is normal. Google *Alerts* are ... not.
Francis, girls always dump nice guys when they meet (and fall gushingly in love with) creepy actor guys. Except if the creepy actor is Tom Cruise, then they RUUUUN.
BTW, my personal experience is as dumpee. I was always the last girl a guy dated before he met the woman of his dreams and married 'her'. Wow, that's an idea for a blog post....
I was also wondering about #s 1, 3, 4, and 6.
Somehow I think that level of backstory is going to kill the humor. Let's just say they range from college to "still waiting" (#4).
What's your type of girl? I'm more than willing to reward you for "I Will Alarm Islamic Owls."
OK, then do you still have #3's number? She's cute!
"Ann": My type of girl is the kind who's willing to make that offer.
Victoria: Alas, no. I think she lives in Arizona now. Also she was a Republican, which may quash your ardor.
Actually, the affair was with me!
Francis: You're right, both facts are deal-breakers.
Rose: As always, I admire your timing.
Hey, wait, she's a lesbian?
(to clarify: post is for entertainment value only, and is not meant to refer specifically to her, or to her, or to her. Or to you for that matter. -V.)