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August 04, 2006
We'll forget the tears we cried
I feel as though you ought to know .
That I’ve been good, as good as I can be,
And if you do, I’ll trust in you,
And know that you will wait for me
::sigh::
Is there anything the Beatles aren't good for?
More hard weeks and months. Acupuncture has been very helpful for the migraines, but I'm on a month-long hiatus while my acupuncturist is on vacation, and I don't think my body had quite consolidated all the help from the acupuncture yet. That is to say, I'm not quite ready to make it on my own. Headaches have abounded and rebounded, and mostly ruined a trip to San Antonio, where I was invalided and unable to stay up late playing wonderful reindeer games.
I've returned home to more angst, and the million-dollar question. How can I be worthy of another's love? I don't know that any of us is ever worthy, that love is itself always a leap of faith. And I, impetuous girl that I am, am always ready to leap first, but when no one follows, well, I find myself crashed on the rocks below.
Which is where I am now. And as I am off alcohol for the duration of my acupuncture vacation, I can't even drown my sorrows in a fine martini. I'm depressed enough to sleep, though, so that's the order for the night.
When the heat abates it'll be fall running season again, and I'm sure as hell ready to lace up my shoes. I'm hoping I can train for a four-mile race that's the day after my 35th birthday, but if I don't make that one, there will definitely be other short-distance runs I can do before the weather turns cold. I'll get back on the pavement this year, I know it.
Posted by Rose at August 4, 2006 10:27 PM
Comments
Oh, Rose. I've only met you the one time, but I thought you seemed like a very loveworthy person. And without even thinking, I can think of at least three friends of mine who would fall totally in stupid with you if you were to meet. I'm sure that that's not at all your point, but I'm just saying.
And if you're well enough to go on another excursion, I'm your woman.
Posted by: I. at August 5, 2006 11:49 AM
hugs to you, girlfriend. i'm so sorry to hear that headaches have hit again, you sounded so optimistic at texSAcon! ... about the other stuff, well, if you never put yourself out there to get your heart broken, you'll never get it loved either.
thinkin' of you... and sending you my girl to play with next week!
Posted by: gotcha at August 7, 2006 04:31 PM
Wow. Sounds like we should talk again. Sorry that we've lost touch.
Posted by: D'gou at August 22, 2006 08:23 AM